Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Jesus Struck Down By Zeus

After years of playing second fiddle to the Christian deity, Olympic God Zeus struck a mighty blow on Monday, burning to the ground a 6-story tall statue of Jesus Christ outside Cincinnati, Ohio.  Dubbed "Touchdown Jesus" for the its upreaching (a'preaching?) arms, the statue was a 62-foot high landmark of the Solid Rock Church in Monroe, Ohio.

In a statement, the Zeus Society of Southwestern Ohio said, "Take zat, beeotches!"

The Pope did not return phone calls for comment.

The Solid Rock Church is insured by Cincinatti Cinsurance Company, who is refusing to pay for the estimated $700,000 in damages.  When reached by phone, a representative of the mid-sized insurance company serving thousands of businesses in the Greater Cincinnati area stated that the church's policy "did not cover 'Acts of God.'"

The church is planning to fight that decision on the basis that there is only One True God and that Zeus is merely a "deity."


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